American culture, Derek Jeter, LeBron James, Uncategorized

A Life of Lazy Fastballs

For an examination of all that ails our decaying American culture and society, look no further than Derek Jeter’s first at-bat in the 2014 Major League Baseball All-Star Game.

Jeter got the unbelievably kind gesture of a couple fastballs, right down the middle. These courtesy pitches, from Adam Wainwright, were meant allow the great Jeter a chance to get a hit in his final All-Star game before retiring at season’s end.

jeterNever mind that this game is supposed to be important because it decides home-field advantage for the World Series.

“I was going to give him a couple pipe shots,” St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Adam Wainwright said. “He deserved it.”

Frankly, aside from the free pass to be publicly idolized, Jeter didn’t deserve to be there based simply on merit. He ranks as one of the worst shortstops in the majors this season. But the fans determine who goes to the All-Star game, and they wanted their hero in the game.

But while America paid #re2pect to Derek Jeter, I #cringed.

The Nike ad that went viral this week on Jeter was touching, very cool and well done, but this embarrassing display of over-honoring our sports heroes serves as yet another reminder that we have got societal shortcomings that must be addressed.

For starters, there is the humility of Derek Jeter during the 2014 Fare Thee Well tour. For example, to put that ad together, Nike needed Jeter’s cooperation. They needed him to film it.

Can it be a touching, poignant tribute if you played a part in filming scenes for it? Can you be humble and do the “awe, shucks, you shouldn’t have” routine if you are participating in the shine? Following the All-Star game, after being named MVP, Jeter spoke at the press conference about how a night about him wasn’t a night about him.

The paradoxes are endless here. But this is not Derek Jeter’s fault.

No, his hubris aside, these grandiose gestures are bypassing the unspoken rules we have been ignoring for a long time, anyway. We decided to bid a long farewell before they actually are gone, all to appreciate what they have given us.

What they’ve given us is something to latch on to and distract ourselves from. That’s all sports are – entertainment. They can teach us about heart, effort, teamwork and dedication, but more often than not, they serve as a distraction from the day-to-day simplicity of life.

Jeter and the Yankees are the best representative of this. There was something about the mid-to-late 1990s. New York seemed to be on resurgence in cool. Part Seinfeld and Friends, part Yankees, part Rudy Guiliani. And we looked to the Yankees following 9/11, looked to follow their lead with American pride literally bursting with emotion.

Maybe that’s why we’re so wrapped up in honoring these guys, even though our gratitude has been paid (literally – and in millions) for years.

We are attached to our professional athletes, dangerously so. We ask far too much of them to support our emotional imbalance from our own lives feeling unfulfilled.

It can engulf us, our families, our friends, and in the case of Cleveland, an entire region.

We were so quick to jump on the fairy tale bandwagon of LeBron James return to Cleveland and the Cavs, that we overlooked everything prior to it. The unbiased media was biased in rooting for LeBron’s return home.

They ignored all the prior theories about why and how he left the Cavs in the first place to gush about a love story. It was and remains fun to pick on the Heat now, easy to forget that LeBron picked them and then did nearly exactly what he did to the Cavs four years ago. There may not be a “Welcome Party” or a televised special, but we’re still enthralled with it. His website crashed on Thursday due to constant refreshes.

Miami Heat Introduce LeBron James, Chris Bosh and Dwyane WadeJames misled Pat Riley and the Heat front office, as well as his supposed brothers Chris Bosh and Dwyane Wade, for a few weeks, trying to let his PR folks figure out how to handle it better this time around, knowing full well that most likely, the vast majority would be delighted he’d come to his senses and returned to Cleveland.

Should it – does it – matter that James did both the Cavs and Heat dirty, or can we even acknowledge this time around he did? See, we’re fine with certain things, a bending of the rules and the moral code, as long as we like the end result or the person.

We are fine with this decision because Cleveland needs him, he’s from there, Miami has more sunshine in a day that majority of us see in a week, Riley’s legendary status was not enough for once, the Heat had their success and you shouldn’t be able to win with your friends at a discount.

Above all, it’s just a heartwarming story. And man, are we a sucker for those.

You can be an egocentric individual and a great athlete – believe it or not, many before have. So LeBron James can be a great basketball player. He can want to be in Cleveland. He can be a good husband, a great role model and father, as well as tremendous at a number of other things. But can also be a disingenuous businessman.

It’s OK for us to admit these things, still want these athletes to succeed and win our favorite team’s championships. But we just can’t bring ourselves to admit anything like that.

We need them too badly.

We do the same thing with actors. We want to believe they are the characters we see in the movies. We’re stunned at the rumors and the arrests, disappointed they failed our expectations. And then we go right back to watching their films, because we need them way more than they need us.

We need heroes to distract us from our schedule-oriented, consumer-driven lives. We need them to wear the championship shirts, to have some seminal event to share half-drunk with friends, to bond with our children.

This is both understandable and remarkably sad at the same time.

We value the real heroes, the ones who died, sacrificed themselves for us and gave all to protect our freedoms. But we only do this on holidays where we are reminded of it. Our society, our culture, demands that our heroes forever be in our face, in our minds, lest we forget who we truly idolize.

We’ll always want and need Jeter, Jordan and James because they are someone to follow from a distance. And following at a distance allows us to not get hurt, to feign emotion and allows for easy backlash, if ever required. Our disappointment, while directed at them, is really with ourselves.

No wonder Twitter is such a big hit.

You may be asking yourself why this is a problem? Who cares and what does it matter?

Simple: our hero worship is so out of control that it is controlling us. We want our kids to be heroes, so we push them too hard, scream at their coaches and yell at their teachers. At the same time, ironically, we don’t want them embarrassed, so we shield them from possible pain and rejection. This is why everyone gets a trophy. This is why cuts are no longer publicly announced – even for a high school play.

In our own bitterness, resentment and disdain, we’re erasing the very things that balance us out and make us real for future generations: pain

Rejection and pain were meant to serve as a catalyst to something more. Once upon a time, they did. In fact, these very heroes we worship all have their stories of pushing beyond someone else’s no.

Now, we’re all too happy to use them as an excuse. This leads to a life of feeling sorry for ourselves, passing the days remaining in our lives by hoping for our hero’s successes or failures, all while buying their music, their movies, their jerseys.

Love or hate LeBron James or Derek Jeter over these past few weeks, we made them. We empowered them.

If we are even remotely interested in solving some of our bigger issues, it would serve us good to spend more time reflecting on what we can do to make ourselves less emotionally dependent on the success of others.

If we poured even 25-percent of what we give them into ourselves, I bet it would be amazing what could be accomplished, both as individuals and as a collective society.

The only problem is, those days seem long passed us now. We bypass challenges these days. We don’t pay even pay tribute in the right way.

We just throw lazy fastballs.

Right down the middle.

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LeBron James, Media, NBA Free Agency, Society & Culture

Searching for Sources

Roughly four years ago, I wrote this piece about unconfirmed stories, rumors and the growing use of “sources” as a complete cop-out.

Oddly enough, four years ago we had the absolute circus known as “The Decision” when we all collectively freaked out because a young man we (fans and media) gave a ton of fame and attention to at a young age chose a new basketball team.

LeBron-James-DecisionFunny how much and how little changes over time.

We didn’t like the bombastic manner in which LeBron James joined Chris Bosh and Dwayne Wade in Miami – though in hindsight, the televised event raised over $6 million for charity.

No, we had a problem with the “Welcome Party” the following day – you know, “Not one, not two…

And who wouldn’t, really? The brash, bold, self-aggrandizing manner in which they presented their new union was more than a touch overboard.

Still, did we take the time, in the moment, to analyze what was happening? No, not really. And we rarely do, because we are human. We need and want instant reaction, gratification and resolve. We were all busy burning jerseys, bashing, mocking, and defending.

I was among the masses, proclaiming that the “King” was a bit out of his element, that he hadn’t won anything, that, at 25-years old, he had severely overplayed his hand.

But over time, I accepted this narrative: his handlers had blown the whole TV thing, Jim Gray made it all seem a bit cheesy and most importantly, I thought that James was still in many ways a child-like person, just trying to break out and do something bold.

He never went to college, therefore wasn’t recruited, so it seems logical that he liked the recruiting process of free agency in 2010 – something that after many years in Cleveland, he’d earned the right to do. The Cavs never got him the help he needed. Jordan would not have won titles with that scurvy crew of misfits.

Feeling under-appreciated, feeling boxed-in, James went to Florida, to beaches and Pat Riley’s legendary figure, to Mickey Arison, a hipster dude who owns cruise ships and a basketball team. He went with buddies he made on the Olympic team, guys he knew didn’t suck at the sport of basketball, as it seemed his fellow teammates on the Cavs kind of did.

What was the truth in 2010? Probably a little bit of both.

And now? Well, I’m not sure any of what’s going on with James reasoning matters as much as how much stock we’re putting into reading tea leaves.

We think way too much of our athletes and role models in the public sphere, and yet at the same time, we dehumanize them. They have emotions, they have biases. They have their reasons. We just don’t care about that.

All this is to say, I can see how and why James would want to return to Cleveland now, four years later. A bit more accomplished to say the least, a bit more mature, perhaps even better equipped to handle the ridiculous amount of pressure applied by the greater Cleveland fan base.

I can also see how and why James would stay in Miami, even if for only a year or two.

Does James play into the power trip? Of course. And if you’re waiting for him to not, you are simply in the wrong era of athlete.

What about all of us? What about the fans in Cleveland who burned his jersey, now pleading for his return? What of the owner who comically, sans-ily wrote the most vicious and disgraceful e-mail in the history of people who got picked last? What about the Heat fans who walked out and booed in the Finals? What about our collective reaction to the cramps?

For better or worse, this man cannot win. And we like it that way, for whatever reason. So no matter what this decision yields, we’re ready to lose our minds.

And that is the entire crux of the problem. It feels as though nothing has happened, yet everything is happening.

James himself has done and said little to perpetuate the absolute ridiculous and scary uproar through the media over a possible return to Cleveland.

LeBron James The decision 2014This brings us back to sources.

You’d think we’d have learned something from 2010, from attaching legitimacy to rumors, to giving full credence and exposure to “sources.”

But we haven’t learned a damn thing. If anything, we’re doing it all worse than before. From New York to Miami to Cleveland to Los Angeles, we’re all preparing for way too much joy and way too much anger.

Have you ever seen so many formerly reputable people get so much wrong? And someone reputable will be proven wrong, for sure. There are so many journalists and media types on both sides of the fence that there is no gray area. Reputations will be damaged.

And why? Because they are rushing to get anything out in an effort to provide the smallest morsel of information, to satisfy us. We crave it. We say we don’t, we act annoyed and we pretend like we don’t want it, but we do.

This is our drug. It’s speculation, gossip and the need to know what we don’t really need to. And the addicts need fed. Which is why we’re hearing anything and everything.

Cupcake shop owners claiming it’s a done deal. Moms who say LeBron’s wife’s pregnancy is enough to push him back to Cleveland. Someone who talked to someone in James’ group in Vegas who told a friend that Pat Riley exposed the pregnancy to the media before James had a chance to tell all his family and friends, so now they are mad and hurt.

Web programmers who have found hidden code on his website that shows the color scheme could change to Cavs base colors. People tracking Dan Gilbert’s plane, people watching and staking LeBron’s homes in Miami and Cleveland.

Look at us? Are we not entertained? We asked for it. And we can’t deny it any longer. SportsCenter, talk radio and Twitter are breaking records for viewers, listeners and refreshes per minute. James’ website crashed today. All because we’re seeking another hit, another piece of dubious intel.

And the media, addicted to our clicks because it brings pay raises and job promotions (see Broussard, Chris, 2010), are more than happy to find something, anything to be our dealer.

Is this a harsh or unfair analogy? Maybe, maybe not.

We want the media to check its sources? We should be checking ours.

Our sources, after all, are what permits this whole charade to begin with. A culture obsessed with the dirt and greed produces just that. We’re angry either way with James, then and now, because we’re jealous.

We’re outraged by his greed and the greed of athletes everywhere, but we’d do the same thing. We blast them for taking max deals and the money and playing for owners with less-than high morals, then blast them even more for collaborating with each other to take less and play with their friends and win championships.

We won’t be happy, no matter what. Social media is certainly intensifying the issue. It didn’t exist for Jordan’s playing days, or we would have destroyed him, too.

We’re easily bored, ready to tear down our idols just as fast as we build them up.

And why? Because it makes us feel better about us. Our lives are relatively empty, so it would seem by the way we follow celebrities and blow things completely out of proportion.

We have few true sources of joy and purpose as a society at large, so we do this. We ignore the news and stories that really matter, really make a difference, and throw all our emotions and interest to following adults who play kids games for large amounts of money switch companies to do the same job. We cut people down, and cut people off before we flip them off.

We jump jobs for money, then ask how they have the nerve. We cheat on our spouses, lie to our friends and cut corners, then put them on blast for doing the same. We scream at youth sporting events, officials and blame coaches, then call the pros cowards for doing the same in an interview where they’re goaded into the same. We’re hypocrites and we’ve created this.

‘Merica, right?

So here we are, four years later, having learned really nothing. We still wait with baited breath to find out where LeBron James will spend the next year, two or four, putting a basketball through a metal circle. Until we find what our collective culture is looking for, we’ll just keep on doing in this, in truly mind-numbing ways.

We’re in full-blown instant gratification mode now, seeking resolution merely for the sake of being able to move on with our judgments, our condemnation, our praise and dissection.

Feed the beast, LeBron. We’re hungry.

It’s just what we do now.

Before we blame anyone for this mess, perhaps we are the ones who should check our sources. Because I’m nearly 63.2 percent sure that according to reports, our intentions are dubious at best.

And we are all witnesses.

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