American culture, Chip Kelly, fired NFL coaches, gossip, Hollywood, Philadelphia Eagles, Star Wars, Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Uncategorized

Perceived Perfection

Two thousand sixteen.

We have arrived in this, the future, and it by all accounts resembles the recent past. In some cases, it might even resemble a distant past, too.

As a society, we seem to be tempered in our expectations of what we can accomplish because we see firsthand what we have been unable to accomplish to this point, all the while unaware of the fact we very much hand a part to play in what was unaccomplished all along.

So much displeasure going on all around us. So much lamenting. So much longing for the future, too busy to enjoy the present. A present which will become the past that we will begin to long for.

Ironic.

After all, what kind of malcontents would be if we didn’t endlessly hype how excited we were to be taken back to a galaxy far, far away in film, doll out a collective $1.7 billion in three weeks to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens, only to turn right around and bash it as “unimaginative” and whine about the former film prodigy J.J. Abrams’ lack of originality?

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We beg – no, demand – updated classics, then complain when it’s too retro? We want retro Jordan’s and then complain that they are either too identical or not similar enough. Didn’t we skewer Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull for being not enough like the other Indy movies?

I can’t keep up. No one, pardon the pun, forced you to see that movie.

The same as no one forced George Lucas to sell the Lucasfilm and Star Wars galaxy for $4 billion to Disney. Those “white slavers” as he calls them.

Didn’t Lucas create Jar-Jar Binks?

Uh, I’ll just leave that out there, Mr. Lucas.

But Lucas is simply much the same as the rest of us in the modern age: immediately regretful of what we no longer have, though we didn’t treat it all that well when we had it and unable to move on to something else until we’ve sufficiently trashed it.

Sadly, the rest of us don’t have the $4 billion to ease the burden of negativity. Careful, George; remember what that path of anger and resentment can lead to?

But there’s another, deeper, more sinister than Sith reason we turned so quickly on Star Wars: The Force Awakens: snark.

The snark is all around us. Our snide remarks are becoming our only remarks as we remove ourselves more and more from the actual world to engaging with the vast majority of people electronically.

Would you really type half of what you do if you were to see the person in a hallway?

And how often has pressure from others led you to comment or fire off at the fingertips that which you wouldn’t have said previously?

Philadelphia Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie called Chip Kelly a culture-builder, an excellent coach, someone he liked and respected and someone who didn’t need to prove anything to anyone just four months ago, in September 2015.

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Last week, Lurie couldn’t fire Kelly fast enough, leaked false info to the press about it, and generally smeared him for 48 straight hours.

Why?

The nameless, faceless social media mobs in full snark attack mode, pushed Lurie – who gave Andy Reid 14 years on the job until hiring Kelly – to do the exact opposite of what he said.

We’re all engaged in social media in some way, yet we’re terrified of it at the same time.

We hate to scroll through the feeds and see nearly 75 percent of what we are subjected to see, but addicted to the habit or the “information” we think we’re getting.

We don’t want to put it down, but we can’t put it up.

For every viral post about a child who had their wish fulfilled or someone doing a good deed for someone, there are 4,553 posts of selfies, quizzes and generally everyone complaining about something.

Better still: a good deed has to go “viral” to get the proper attention for it. Remember, if it is not on social media, it didn’t happen right?

Then again, there’s plenty of jibberish that passes through social media that does not pass the sniff test. Take the endless election cycle, for instance.

I’m not sure what I think about any of the 2016 presidential candidates because of the sensory overload I’ve experienced during the start of the campaign season.

And because I have no idea what they actually want to do through some combination of overexposure and underexposure, I feel completely unprepared to vote in six months, even though my state will vote too late for the primary to actually matter.

There’s both sincerity and sarcasm in that last paragraph. Sadly.

The truth is, I somewhat pity these folks. True, they make these boneheaded mistakes themselves, only to nosedive in polls that I thought everyone agreed three years ago didn’t really matter, but still.

If we thought the era of social media and treading and mea culpas had reached it’s pinnacle, think again. We’re roasting these candidates on the open fire of social media.

You step into the world of snark, you best come ready. Not many survive. And unfortunately, these candidates can’t play it cool like the rest of us: chilling on the sidelines, sharing only what we want to share, what we assume the online world wants to see from us: perceived perfection.

It is what we strive for now, perception. It can be any different types. We can become anything we want online, through our Insta-feeds, Twitter bios and Facebook posts.

We can be funny, we can be mysterious. We can be brooding, we can be political. We can be fit, we can be alcoholics. We can be vain, caring, jet-setters and turbulent.

I am sure it is not that cut and dry. I am certainly guilty of it, too. You can click through status updates and pictures of my five children, my wife and myself and you’d get a bunch of pearly whites and smiles at the intersection of Constant Fun and Perfect Family.

We are only perfect for us, folks. And some days, my neurosis leads me to wonder if I’m even perfect for them that day. We get angry. We cry. We lose our temper when the milk is spilled for the thirtieth time in 12 days.

You might like us for an afternoon or weekend, but we would get on your nerves, I swear. And likewise, I bet you would get on ours, too.

We’re all looking around at each other like we have got it together, but in reality, we are running our day-to-day lives more like the Cleveland Browns than the New England Patriots.

But apparently, life just looks better with a filter.

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Of course it does. Any sunset with palm trees and beaches looks enviable.

If it is your daily life that could use some contrast, sharpness, color and filter adjusted, consider being more social and less media.

Personally, my goal  in 2016 is to be a bit more transparent, to be more positive in my day-to-day life, less anxious and neurotic, and do my best to enjoy the present moment, unfiltered.

Plus, I have got to pay more attention to this presidential election thing.

I still don’t know what they stand for.

The polls say that’s not good, considering my gender, party affiliation, race, breakfast intake, height, income and inclination to watch Friends re-runs with my wife on Netflix.

 

 

 

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American culture, American People., Fiscal Cliff, Gun Control, Hollywood, Sandy Hook Elementary, Society, United States

The Unused Power of the People


Much has been made of the now-averted “fiscal” cliff, but truthfully, we’ve gone off the selfish cliff.
From almost forgetting the horror of Sandy Hook to our resignation that it’s OK to raise taxes and spending as long as it’s not my taxes, we just don’t seem to care unless we are affected directly.

What will it take for us as a people to act? We have so much more power standing collectively than fighting as individuals.

Should someone come into your home and just grab whatever money you have in your wallet or purse each night? Would that do it? Would you feel violated? Outraged?
I know several friends and family members that are completely fine with the argument that the country’s wealthiest earners should pay more in income and payroll taxes.
“I don’t make over $400,000 a year,” said someone to me recently. “Why should it bother me? And those people should pay more.”
It should bother you, me and everyone because even though it’s not you this time, it will be next time. They’re coming for more money. And they start with the rich and work their way down the line.
See, the conversation and discussion is all wrong – this isn’t just about one economic group in this nation, it’s about all income levels. Whether you pay $150 in taxes or $1.5 million, where is every dollar going and why?
What we should be asking – no, demanding – from our elected officials is this: why is there a need to raise taxes on anyone? Why do you need more of our money? We can’t trust you with what you get from us now!
The package that was passed earlier this week to avert said “fiscal cliff” will add $4 billion in debt. How is that even possible? How do you raise taxes and over time still add that much money to the deficit? What’s worse is the deal made by Congress earlier this week was seen as a compromise – of course it was. Because they created this mess, let’s all congratulate them for averting disaster and putting off the debt ceiling conversation for three months.
Well done, guys and gals.
What if we all agreed to not vote for anyone, any incumbent, who contributes to raising the debt? We might get 100 new elected officials every year for the next four years, but we’d eventually find people who do what we want them to, right? Because as crazy as it sounds, that’s what our elected officials in Congress are there for – to do the will of the people. They represent us.
Except they don’t. They represent themselves and re-elections. And as for the “us”, well, we can’t get out of our own way and get our stuff together in terms of values, guiding principles and general decorum.  
There was an article posted late Monday night about how all the staffers and members of Congress had to order out and get pizza and wings on New Year’s Eve and how depressing that was.
I laughed because I thought it was the punchline of a joke. That’s not sad. Millions of Americans eat like that every New Year’s Eve – and not by choice. Millions of Americans work late into the night on a holiday because they get triple pay for overtime. We need more because now we give more than ever before in our history.
Meanwhile, we spend less time with family, with friends, with spouses.
This vacuum is why Facebook and Twitter exist. They keep us connected to the world when we’re so wrapped up in ours. Except they dehumanize our relationships, take the emotion out and make everything instant and matter of fact.
What do we get when we spend less time with our children? Or better yet, what do they not get from us? How about our spouses? Are marriages stronger? Relationships of any kind, when less time and energy and effort go into them?
And we ask ourselves how we ended up with the massacre of elementary school students? Shootings in a movie theater? High divorce rates? Rising debt? Unmotivated masses, shrinking more each day into their own bubbles.
Wake up! We are the problem. We don’t take the time to fix it. We talk about it on Facebook and Twitter or at our holiday parties and then we move on. Next issue. On to my personal problems, right?
Wake up! Is it going to take your child’s elementary school being unspeakably shaken by tragedy before something is actually done to protect them? I mean, I’m in favor of the Second Amendment, but I’m not sure why anyone needs to be able to buy a Rambo-style machine gun and as much ammo as they can fit in their car trunk.
But Congress can’t talk about that for a few more weeks because they’re “fixing” the “fiscal cliff” they created by mismanaging our money to begin with. So what makes us think these geniuses can fix something like coming up with a logical, modernized second amendment that while protecting the rights of citizens to arm themselves, won’t allow for them to pretend they are preparing for Red Dawn, Part II?
That debate that everyone said we needed to have on gun control lasted in the media for all of 10 days – right up until Christmas and Kim Kardashian announcing she was becoming Kayne West’s baby momma.
We’re running out of time, my friends. What our ancestors and American decendants worked so hard to build in terms of values is being short-sold by our own selfishness, obsession with the material and overall failure to act. We expect others to clean up these messes, but we don’t take action – or build sustained action – ourselves.
There is great power in the people – us, the collective whole that make up our society. If we can set aside these specific arguments, say on faith, tax brackets, marriages, for a brief moment and look at the bigger picture to unite under, we’ll have a greater success at reclaiming and reestablishing our guiding principles that sustain our first world way of life and the freedoms we so take for granted.
Is this the kind of world we want to live in or leave our children with?
Case in point: a recent pollsuggests a majority of Americans don’t feel it’s necessary for Congress to force Hollywood to produce less violence in their products. Yet when every fabric of our vast knowledge suggests that violence begets violence, especially when exposed to the young, why wouldn’t we want that? What if we absolutely forbade anyone under the age of 18 from seeing an R-rated movie, even with a parent?
Our collective selfish nature says we don’t want them to take away what we, as adults, enjoy so much. Do we? Because since Sandy Hook, I can’t watch a violent movie, kudos to you who can. It’s difficult to separate reality from art now. As I said then, everything is different – and it has to be. The very essence and core of our lives is at stake.
What are we doing? What’s it going to take? What will be our breaking point?
Because we are already, quite rapidly, defining our downfall.
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