BYU, Florida Gators, Jimmer Fredette

Fire Away, Jimmer

Head’s up, Jimmer.
 
The crowd is closing in now and they’ve begun kicking and screaming, now that you went down shooting.
They say you don’t play defense.
They say you shoot too much.
They blame you for the loss to Florida in the Sweet 16.
No handle. No hops.
Tune it out, because, dude, you can shoot.
It’s increasingly rare, really, that someone can shoot like you do. It’s like watching the Jordan versus Bird McDonald’s commercials.
Off the scoreboard, off the floor, nothing but net.”
They can pick holes in your game, that’s fine – frankly, I agree with most of the widely held qualms about your style of play.
But they are missing the point.
This wasn’t ever about defense, or dropping dimes, or a floor-slapping defensive possession.
This was about a kid who once played at the New York State Pen, dropped 40 and got a standing ovation from the prisoners. At the age of 10. With armed guards surrounding the court.
There’s far more wrong with the media than there is with your game. They don’t get it – it’s about the show.  
You’re playing for every has-been gunner, every Y-League and open gym average Joe who thinks he can fill it up. Every guy who’d rather catch a blow on defense as opposed to fighting throw another screen. Just makes you more tired on offense and who needs that, really.
If you played for anyone but BYU, maybe you’d have to play more D. Truth is, you’re the only offense that team had. And they know it.
Sure, I wondered why you didn’t take the Tyus kid to the hole off the ball screen switch late in the Florida game like you had throughout the year when the bigs switched on you at the top of the key, but there was something strangely and perfectly poetic about a gunner going down, well, gunning.
From deep water. From downtown. From where the dust settles on the court.
You emptied your gun, and from a former has-been gunner, I tip my hat.
They want to point to your lack of defense and overall quickness as an NBA sin, something that you’ll pay for down the road.
Maybe.
Or maybe you’ve just solidified the legend of Jimmer Fredette.
We will talk about you for decades, long after Nolan Smith, Kyle Singler and Harrison Barnes have been forgotten, including what team they played for. There’s nothing different or discernible about everyone else’s game – except yours.
The deep ball.
You dropped 40 on teams who double teamed you as effortlessly as a newspaper being dropped off on a doorstep every morning.
So what if you can’t, won’t or haven’t played any defense? What does that matter? Why does your game have to fall into some finely printed stat sheet? Not everyone can be Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant or Rajon Rondo.
Stat sheets are meant to be filled, right? Who said you had to fill every category?
The media decided it would be nice if you did, I suppose. And now, they’ve recently decided that since you only fill up the points column, there’s a problem with you.
No, no, Jimmer, the problem is with them.
In today’s game, nearly every player can jump and put their head on the rim, every guy is quick. Seven-footers take threes, point guards grab a dozen rebounds. 

But you, you my friend are an old soul – you shoot and shoot and shoot. 

And then, you shoot some more.

What’s ironic is that same 7-footer who can shoot a three can’t make a drop-step power move and shies away from physical contact down low. The point guard who grabs 15 rebounds and dishes out 10 assists? He can’t shoot a pull-up jumper to save his life – or hit a free throw.
So what’s their problem, these haters? They salivate over those guys, but snub their nose at you?
What’s wrong with a 6-foot-2, curly haired, stocky guard filling it up for two straight years and firing from 30-feet?
What’s wrong with a college athlete who is polite, smart and reads the Bible in their hotel room and doesn’t have tattoo sleeves?
Nothing.
There is nothing wrong with you. Don’t let them tell you otherwise, either.

You bring something to the game that no one else can: the wow factor.

Out of all the basketball that’s seen in our house, your 28-foot three-pointer, from just inside the American ribbon on the floor, with about five minutes to go last Thursday is the only play all year that made my 9-year-old son completely freak out.
I mean, laughing, jumping, arms waving, did-you-see-that-dad, freak out.
Who else has a catch phrase (You Got Jimmered!)? Who else would be described as having “Jimmer Range”?
Am I crazy, or isn’t that meant as a compliment?
Apparently, because your team lost, you played little defense and you uncharacteristically shot the ball like every other college player for once, it’s a bad thing to them now.
Maybe they should pay attention to the other factors at play – like the fact that your team’s second best player was booted off the team and, against Florida, a real contender until they hit Butler’s Tournament Magic (someone copyright that, pronto), you were BYU’s only chance.
Did anyone mention that Florida’s team was taller and vastly more athletic at every position? That Florida was filled with Billy Donovan’s five-stars while BYU had one star – you? That you had your chin busted open and were dealing with a calf strain?
Anybody touch on the fact that you played all 44-minutes with said calf strain and busted chin? That you had to put up more trick shots than one would at a Harlem Globetrotters tryout?
Wait, you were supposed to pass to the open man, right? Yeah, the same guys who, when they did get an open look, blew an assortment of layups and 10-footers that most third grade teams would make?
Don’t apologize for that.
Your teammates should be grateful that you dragged their carcasses around for the last two years and for allowing them to be a part of it.
Instead, you get this, from teammate Nick Martineau:
“The weird thing is, [his defense] has gotten progressively worse over the year. From the start, he’s never really been accountable to it, but it’s just gotten looser as the year’s gone on. But he can play defense. He really can. He’ll definitely tighten it up for the NBA.”
Allow me to retort for you, Jimmer.
Hey Nick, your offense has gotten progressively worse and you’ve never been accountable for it. But we’re sure you can play it. You’ll definitely show your game at local Provo Y-Leagues and BYU Alumni games.
See, it’s easy to be critical of others. The point of basketball, aside from outscoring the other team and winning, is to compliment your teammates as best you can.
Looking back, to prove these ungrateful people wrong, they should have taken a couple games and just ran the offense through your teammates, Jimmer. Then, we would see how well the Cougars did. Watch those ESPN headlines roll in, right? Think they still beat a top ranked team twice in conference and secure a 3-seed in the NCAA Tournament?
Please.
Without Jimmer, BYU doesn’t even sniff the tournament. Without Jimmer, they win only a handful of games.
Without Jimmer, we all suffer. We suffer from watching the same mindless ball screens, pick and rolls and motion offenses where every player scores between six and 16 points a game.
No one says “Give me more Wisconsin basketball!
No one’s watching five passes and then a shot from 14-feet. This isn’t 1955 and we’re not wearing nut-huggers anymore. You have to do something different, something special.
You were and are different, Jimmer. Don’t ever change.
When you get your NBA tryouts with various teams over the next few months, give ‘em Jimmer Range. If they ask you about your defense, tell them your offense is your defense. 

Keep living the dream, on behalf of gunners everywhere.

Keep shooting, kid.
Empty your gun, if only because nobody else will.
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Charlie Sheen, ESPN, Jason Whitlock, Lawrence Taylor, NFL, Pete Rose

Crime and (Lack of) Punishment

Buried in the sports pages and difficult to find within hours of being posted on the ESPN, Fox Sports and SI websites, there is a story out there that no one wants to address.
Former New York Giants star Lawrence Taylor is now a registered sex offender.
No one, not even Jason Whitlock, seems willing to tackle this nasty news and offer an opinion on Taylor or the seedy underbelly of humanity in which Taylor has long dwelled.
While I am disappointed in the current voices of sports media for not touching this story with a 10-foot pole, I get it. I understand why. Who wants to go there?
The whole situation is disgusting, impure and just plain gross. Just reading Taylor’s comments on the matter leave you in dire need of a shower. You’d need turpentine for your eyes.
But if we don’t discuss this, if it’s not addressed, then we’re doing a great disservice.
Or maybe I just need to get it off my chest.
Life and sports aren’t always happy. Every day is not a video montage of “One Shining Moment.” It’s not always feel good stories.
I get it. During a time of optimism, with baseball on the brink of another season, the beginning of spring and the NCAA Tournament providing smiles and buzzer beaters (as well as a distraction from this silly NFL labor dispute), the last thing we want to talk about is a washed up, former pro athlete who has been given probation for the use of an underage prostitute.
But it must be said: Lawrence Taylor is sick, depraved and should be in jail.
It’s widely known that Taylor used narcotics throughout his career and was suspended several times by the NFL for drug use. It’s also widely know that Taylor really ramped up this activity after his playing career was over, spending thousands of dollars a day on cocaine and basically living in seclusion surrounded by other drug users.
Taylor has admitted to using prostitutes before, mainly between 1994-2001, but last year he was indicted on charges of third degree statutory rape, sexual misconduct and patronizing a 16-year-old prostitute. He recently pled guilty and avoided jail time, receiving six years’ probation.
But he made no apologies.
Taylor told Fox News’ Shepard Smith that he blamed the institution of prostitution for ending up with an underage girl, but never took responsibility for himself.
“I’m not the cause of prostitution,” Taylor said. “And sometimes I make mistakes and I may go out there. And I didn’t pick her up on no playground. She wasn’t hiding behind the school bus or getting off a school bus. This was a working girl that came to my room.”
Just the fact he had to distinguish her as someone who wasn’t getting off a school bus gives me the willies. But a working girl? Yeah, LT, she’s a real 9-5er with deadlines and a briefcase.
Need that turpentine yet?
Whether directly or indirectly, Taylor is one of the causes of prostitution. As long as there are people like Taylor willing to pay for sex, then there will be prostitution.
Taylor said, “I’m not looking for a relationship. Hey, sometimes I look for some company. It’s all clean. I don’t have to worry about your feelings. It’s all clean.”
Actually, Mr. Taylor – it’s anything but clean.
It’s sick and seedy and disgusting.
Regardless of age – 16 or 19 – Taylor has something wrong with him.
This isn’t Charlie Sheen crazy funny, with cute little catch phrases.
It’s just sick and twisted.
The fact that Taylor is indifferent to the whole thing is perhaps most frightening.
“I guess you call it a crime,” he said on Tuesday. “It’s one of those crimes you don’t think about. You never think you’re gonna get busted because everyone does it until you get busted, and then it’s more embarrassing than anything else.”
A crime you don’t think about? No, it’s a crime we don’t think about because most of us don’t engage in that kind of reprehensible activity.
Taylor’s in some different, alternate reality – probably brought on by years of drug use and an out of control, narcissistic and toxic personality that thinks he’s somehow on another level.
He once said, “For me, crazy as it sounds, there is a real relationship between wild, reckless abandon off the field and being that way on the field.”
No, LT, there’s not a relationship. At all.
Taylor created one in his own mind to justify his actions. People do that all the time, some sort of reasoning mechanism to try and convince themselves their actions are not misguided.
Prostitution is a serious crime. Everyone, contrary to his belief, doesn’t do it. And it should be more than embarrassing, it’s should be shameful.
It should be a harsher sentence that six years’ probation.
Taylor is an empty man with an empty soul. Perhaps he’s always been that way.
After the Giants won the Super Bowl in January of 1987, he said, “Everyone was so excited, but by then I felt deflated. I’d won every award, had my best season, finally won the Super Bowl. I was on top of the world, right? So what could be next? Nothing. The thrill is the chase to get to the top. Every week the excitement builds and builds and builds, and then when you’re finally there and the game is over…nothing.”
For people like Taylor, empty people, there is nothing. No joy, no sense of contentment, even during a peak accomplishment.
And so he has continually chased “The Chase” all his life. He’s filled it with prostitution and drugs, searching for the big build, the thrill of the chase.
What he should feel now is the cold bars of prison shutting on his face.
How can you plead guilty to third degree statutory rape and not be in jail? How is it we honor and even remotely respect people like this? How is this man in the Hall of Fame?
He should be first ballot Hall of Shame.
We mock and despise Pete Rose for betting on baseball, but allow Taylor into his sport’s ultimate honor with open arms?
Taylor talks about feeling empty and clearly tries to fill that void by less than noble or honorable means. Thanks to his actions,  we’re the ones left feeling empty and sad. Empty and sad that this emotionless, shell of a man could make millions of dollars in the NFL, in endorsements and movies to feed his actions and his own hubris while hard working people strive just to make it to the next day.
While innocent people die of starvation, of natural disasters – like the tsunami we just saw destroy a part of the globe – Taylor somehow avoids jail time so he can continue to do his best to erase human decency and morality, all while increasing its depravity.
He’s been found guilty of tax evasion, been arrested numerous times for narcotics and prostitution, and now has agreed to a plea bargain of two misdemeanors: sexual misconduct and underage prostitution.
Misdemeanors? Are you kidding me?
It’s safe to say we might have figured out what Taylor has really been chasing all these years: Prison.
It’s only right we fulfill that desire for him, to fill that need that burns deep in his empty heart.
Taylor’s earned it, right? He’s worked hard to achieve it, so I say we give him the same feeling he had after the Super Bowl – that empty feeling of nothing but hard time alone in a prison cell.
There’s no crime in wanting that for you, is there Mr. Taylor?
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Charlie Sheen

I Want A New Drug


Charlie Sheen’s gone off the reservation.
Lost his marbles. A few cards short of a deck. A screw loose. The engine’s running, but nobody’s behind the wheel. The lights are on, but nobody’s home.
Basically, the dude is whacked out crazy.
And we apparently can’t get enough of it.
My friends are texting me quotes. My mother can’t stop watching “The Today Show” for updates straight from Charlie’s mouth, delivered with passion by Charlie’s crazy eyes.
There are Facebook pages and Twitter accounts, growing in followers like some Cult of Crazy.
It got me thinking: why do we love a good, old-fashioned meltdown so much? What does it say about our society that we enjoy this kind of over-the-top moment when you watch someone’s downfall?
Charlie Sheen’s certainly not the first. Clearly, you worry for his kids, but at the same time, how can you not snicker (OK, laugh out loud) at some of his recent comments:
“I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time — and this includes naps — I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”
“Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words — imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.”
“They’re trying to destroy my family. I take great umbrage with that. Defeat is not an option. They picked a fight with a warlock.”
“I am grandiose. Because I live a grandiose life.”
I mean, really, how do you even respond to that without laughing?
If I were one of the sacrificial lambs donated by the networks to interview Sheen, I don’t know how I would even contain myself. Think of the fun to be had there.
Just for fun, my sample question would be, “Charlie, how evil are rainbows and why do you think they are a secret society hell bent on chasing water from our oceans?”
It’s like playing Mad Libs with him.
Charlie Sheen is________.

a)     A total, bitchin’ rock star from Mars 
b)    Winning
c) Currently living at Sober Valley Lodge
d) On a quest to claim absolute victory on every front
e) All of the above
 

And yes, according to Charlie, he’s all of those things and so much, much more.
That said, our attention has been captivated by this? Seriously? It’s fun and all…but, seriously?
People are either scared for this man or laughing at him. Meanwhile, the federal government is barely avoiding shutdowns by approving temporary spending bills. Democrat House Representatives in Indiana have fled to Illinois to avoid doing their job and voting on the calendar items because they don’t have enough votes to stop the purposed legislation.
Why are we not more engaged in these things, you know, the stuff that actually impacts our lives?
Whatever party or political allegiances you have, something’s really wrong here. The posturing, the pleading…sort of reminds me of Charlie Sheen.
I suppose that brings it full circle. The more I watch this unfold, I can’t help but wonder: Is Sheen faking it?
He did pass tests last week for every drug known to exist. (Unless he’s created something undetectable, which warlocks could do, you know, with fire-breathing fists.)
But think about it: Sheen is an actor. 
Was his show, “Two and a Half Men” (which I’ve never seen an episode of), grossly popular? Sure. But there’s a level of fame Sheen has never been able to achieve. It’s the one where everyone in the world is taking about you and only you for a brief period of time.
And most of the time it happens when you get the crazy eyes and spout off at the mouth a bunch of non-sense that makes people laugh, then say, “Wait, is he serious? No…he can’t be…he can’t actually think he’s a warlock – wait, this dude actually said he’s just winning?”
Tends to grab celeb-gossip headlines. Puts you in the cultural lexicon. Creates Sheen-isms.
Before this, Sheen was “Wild Thing” Vaughn, the guy who snorted coke, cheated on his wives and is Martin Sheen’s kid.
It’s easy to see why we fall for it. He’s been in trouble before, seemed like he partied too much and had a lot of drugs and women around him. Those are listed as ingredients on the recipe for crazy.
But you have to wonder the way it’s all playing out if Sheen’s not using his past as an advantage on us. He’s watched us eat up coverage of Lindsay Lohan and the whole reality TV craze, where we like to watch “real” people spew crazy on each other (the dirty secret, of course, is most of reality TV is just as scripted as a sit com).
So maybe Sheen’s scripted this.
It’s like he took all the fun, fabricated facts people have said about Chuck Norris and turned them into his own.
He’s drawing some major bank right now. He owns the network morning shows (don’t think he’d not getting paid for it), bringing in a massive ratings increaase for re-runs of “Two and a Half Men” and watching other channels show some of his old movies on a marathon.
He gets money for all that. Ratings and re-runs bring in the cash. And I suppose if there’s one thing we can tell Charlie’s telling the truth about, it’s that he loves money.
In that context, maybe Sheen’s right. 
He is winning.
And we’re letting him because we’re feeding the crazy. We’re transfixed by this, hypnotized by some alter-Truman Show. The more we eat it up, the more crazy we get from him. 
And there will be others.
Fame is a drug, too. Charlie Sheen’s certainly on that.
I can’t help but wonder if we’re all not high off the fumes.
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